a few years ago at my church, we went through a series on spiritual exercises. one of them was “stopping.” and recently i’ve been convicted of my lack of discipline. i am easily distracted and i’m a bit of a procrastinator. i do what i want if i want to do it, and i don’t do things if i don’t want to. i go to sleep late and drink offensive amounts of coffee to cure my sleeplessness. i avoid commitment whenever possible, and am slightly forgetful. but i just don’t care.
sometimes i feel convicted about it. but i hardly ever do anything about it.
i’ve been catching up  on my read through the Bible in a year thing {see that? catching up, because i’m not caught up}and read this:
the fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge,
but fools despise wisdom and discipline. {prov 1:7}
i read that and didn’t read the word discipline to mean direction, correction or guidance. i read discipline as SELF-CONTROL. the Bible talks all about it. in Bible study we’ve been reading through 1 peter and i keep thinking of where it says to be clear-minded and self-controlled so you can pray. self-control.
this morning i woke up at 5:48 and then at 6:30 to go to church with my dad. and i told my mom, “tell my dad i went back to sleep when he gets here.” and she said “really?” and i responded “…..no. i’m going to go get dressed.” and I WENT. and i got home and changed my clothes and made my bed {checked it off my to-do list, the only thing i’m slightly disciplined at} and then left in sufficient time to get to church before it started. i have a lot of stuff on my to-do list but sat and imagined with sarah after church.
at church the question was posed: what do you need to give up? and it hit me hard. self-indulgence. i cannot do it on my own strength. i’m not foolish in that way; i know that for me to become a disciplined person {to even the slightest degree} i need the strength of God. it’s one huge area of weakness in my life, and praise the Lord for his grace and the way his grace allows me to boldly declare my weakness so that i can claim the power of God, which is perfected in my weakness {1 cor 12:9}.
anyway. that’s what’s on my heart right now.
here are the past 5 days’ pictures.
